Author: Destiny Gonzalez

Am I Feeling Enough? //
A Response to Current Events

The crisis at the border. Family separation. Immigration laws.

It feels like our world is in total disarray, and the images, videos and headlines surrounding this topic have flooded our news feeds, television screens and conversations. You might be numb to another voice on the subject. That’s okay; I have felt the same way.

This post isn’t meant to be another political response. This isn’t the church’s stance on immigration (If you would like to read Antioch’s official response from Senior Pastor Jimmy Seibert, you can find that here). This isn’t me telling you how you should feel or giving you “three practical ways to respond to our nation’s immigration crisis.” This is simply me extending an invitation to process with me. It’s my way of saying, “If you’re hurting for our nation, if you’re not totally sure how to feel or if you have no idea how to respond, I’m with you.”


First off, I am definitely not a political expert. I am an informed American, but my attempts to fully understand the policies and the laws surrounding immigration have left my head spinning. I am not a theologian either. I love Jesus and His people, and I try to follow Him with all that I have. But I can’t give you a perfect answer for how we should respond as the people of God.

I can’t even fully explain how I feel because I have experienced a full range of emotions. Sometimes all I can do is sit on my couch and grieve. My heart hurts for the families that have been broken. I am filled with an anger that I can’t fully explain by a world that seems so unfair. In those moments, I am left shouting in my car and asking God for peace. Then there are the nights that I lay in bed contemplating a trip to one of the detention centers on the border because it doesn’t feel right that I get to rest in my comfortable bed. The fact that I still get to live my life without fear of my family being separated leaves me feeling guilty rather than settled. As a Hispanic-American woman, I sometimes feel like my emotions surrounding the situation should be more extreme.


I feel ashamed if I don’t feel convicted to call my local congressman. Ultimately, I feel helpless, discouraged and longing for Jesus to come quickly.

It may sound strange, but I often desire to feel nothing at all. Maybe you’ve been there too. In that place between feeling everything and wishing I could feel nothing, there is exhaustion. We’re human; we naturally avoid pain. My admonition to you is to not push your emotions away. It isn’t easy, but we must fight against the temptation to become unengaged. We must fight the temptation to sit idly and wait until it stops. I’m fighting with you, and I promise, it’s worth it to allow yourself to feel and to go to those emotional places with God.


As someone who is highly emotional, I constantly have to remind myself that my emotions are valid and God cares about them. There are plenty of people and articles telling us how we should feel, but don’t let that dictate your emotions or your conversations with God. As I have gone through my own process,

I sense God waiting there with open arms. He wants me to come to him with my anger, my sadness, my disappointment and my confusion. And I believe He is waiting for you, too.


Right now I am desperate for that peace, and He is faithful to give it.

I wish I could provide an answer to the problems of this world or solace for the pain so many are experiencing. I can’t. What I can do is share two truths that I hold on to when everything else leaves me confused –

  1. God is Faithful // This is the only thing I can be confident in. From the beginning, God has been for us. Deuteronomy 7:9 says, “Know therefore that the Lord your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love Him and keep His commandments, to a thousand generations.” God cannot be anything but Himself, and He is a God who will pursue, rescue, comfort and wholeheartedly love His people. I have found that holding on to this truth is one of the only things that keeps me sane. The declaration of the faithfulness of God is the only thing that will stand through the ages. It is the only thing that gives me hope in the midst of the brokenness of our world. God is faithful, He loves us and He is ultimately victorious.
  2. God hears my prayers // Jesus said, “I will do whatever you ask in My name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son. You may ask Me for anything in My name, and I will do it.” (John 14:13-14) There is an assurance that God not only listens to our prayers, but He is faithful to answer them. Just like our emotions, God wants to hear the deepest cries of your heart. I promise, my prayers are less than eloquent, but it’s okay. God promises to listen to me. Knowing that my prayers are heard pull me out of that place of helplessness.

These two truths help me in my process, but I mean it when I say that my heart is not to give you a formula on how to make everything better. I simply want you to know that I am hurting with you, but I am also for you. Sometimes I feel helpless, but I am convinced that is why God puts us in community. When we can’t always see how He is working, He puts people around us to help us press on. No matter where you are, I encourage you to not avoid, but to press in. Discover your own process and let God meet you there. He’ll do it, I promise.

I want to be there with you, too. Feel free to contact me here, I’d love to hear from you!

By Destiny Gonzalez – Communications Staff

Destiny serves as the Communications Coordinator, and manages the blog and social media pages.

Grief and The Gospel

Many of us know the story of Lazarus. He was Jesus’ friend who was sick, dead for four days and was then brought back to life. The glory and power of God was displayed like never before, and many of those who came to grieve were stirred to believe as they saw the dead live again.

But before the miracle of verse 43 came Jesus’ emotional response in verse 35.

“Jesus wept.”

The shortest verse in the Bible, but I believe it is one of the most significant acts of Jesus’ life. These two words display God’s heart for us in a unique and powerful way. They essentially encompass the whole gospel.

His response was filled with deep compassion and proved that Jesus was, and still is, willing to “go there.” You know that place. The place we awkwardly avoid because we don’t really know how to engage the situation. The place of loss, and sometimes anger. That place of deep pain where no words ever seem to be enough solace. The place where confusion resides and grief seems to eliminate the possibility of hope.


He knew of the life He was about to speak back into Lazarus, but still, He took a moment to feel the raw and painful emotion of man. He grieved and wept with His friends. This part of the story always stirs something inside of me. There is something so significant and beautiful about Jesus’ response. He could have come to Bethany, told Lazarus’ sisters to stop crying and immediately revived Lazarus. Instead He comforted them by first mourning with them.

I believe the glory of God is magnified when we go to those deep places, allow ourselves to grieve and then still declare that He is faithful and good.

Ultimately it is the sin and brokenness of this world that causes our pain and grief. It isn’t until we are in heaven that the tears will forever dry up and we will experience eternal joy. Jesus wept 2,000 years ago with his friends, and He hurts for us still today. He grieves over the brokenness of the world, and there is an invitation for us to grieve with Him. Jesus isn’t intimidated by our emotions, instead He embraces them. If we try to numb and avoid our pain, we eventually won’t allow ourselves to feel joy either. There is space for us to grieve, and a promise that the Holy Spirit will comfort us.


The gospel is preached every time we are willing to “go there” with someone and then declare hope in the midst of the hurt.

Jesus’ entire life proved His willingness to, “go there” with us. He came to save us, to the point of dying on a cross. But before He committed the act that gave us eternal hope, He stepped fully into our lives. He stood with us and experienced the brokenness of humanity.

Jesus’ ministry was fueled by compassion. We can’t fully declare Jesus to others if we aren’t willing to be stirred by the emotion and pain of those around us.

Grief isn’t bad. Crying isn’t a sign of weakness. Let yourself, “go there” because ultimately, we won’t stay in that place of pain. We will find that Jesus is willing to feel with us and then speak life over us.


  • Let yourself grieve // Maybe it’s a dream, the loss of a loved one or another disappointment. Whatever it may be, there is an invitation to grieve with Jesus. He isn’t intimidated by our emotions, and He won’t rush our grief process. Scripture says that it is in weakness that the power of God is made perfect through us (2 Corinthians 12:9-10). When Jesus left the earth, He sent the Holy Spirit to be our helper and ultimate comforter (John 14:15-31). When we grieve there is a promise that the Holy Spirit will bring us comfort and hope. Take a look at this message from Jimmy on the role of the Holy Spirit.
  • Be willing to go there with someone else // If you know someone that is grieving, ask God how you can best support and care for them. I believe we express the heart of God when we are willing to listen to people’s pain, and when we are willing to cry and grieve with them. The heart of God is not to push away emotion, it is to embrace, comfort and declare hope in the midst of the pain. Carl Gulley shared a powerful message on grief this past fall. He unpacked practical ways we can respond to grief. Check it out here.
  • Read the story of Lazarus and ask God to reveal His heart to you. // This is one of my favorite passages, and Jesus still reveals something new to me every time I read it. I suggest reading it in another translation, I read it in the Passion Translation this morning, and it was a game changer.

By Destiny Gonzalez – Communications Staff


Resolving to Leave Perfection in 2017

Welcome to 2018!

There is something about the start of a new year that has me running to the nearest Target to get calendars, colored pens, sticky notes, a new planner and anything else that is sure to help me have the most successful year yet. My motivation is at an all-time high and my list of resolutions extends down a page in my journal.

But to tell you the truth, my motivation dies out after about a month. I can’t remember one thing that was on my 2017 resolutions list, and my planner has sat idly on my desk for the past few months, just waiting to be replaced on January 1st. I love the idea of a fresh start. I think we all do. But each year after the holidays pass, I find myself caught between the same responsibilities and struggles I woke up with on December 31st, and the desire to check off every single item on my resolutions list.

The recipe for my seemingly perfect year is all there, but things never really play out the way I expect them to.


If you’re anything like me you may be wondering, “How do I get out of this cycle of feeling like I fail every year?”

I’m not going to tell you to give up on making resolutions or to set low goals because I don’t think that is the answer. I believe the answer is to shift our expectations away from perfection.


If perfection were achievable, Jesus never would have died on the cross. Instead, God invites us to press into Him in the areas where we fall short. 2 Corinthians 12:9 says, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness…”


And there is an assurance that His plan is always better than we can comprehend.

So, as we look forward to the New Year I encourage you to resolve to leave perfection in the past. Make a list of resolutions and dream with God about the year ahead. And cut yourself some slack, you don’t have to check everything off your list right away. We are covered by the grace of God, and it’s time for us to extend grace to ourselves.


With the desire for perfection in the past, check out three ways to help you set yourself up for a great year:

  1. Invite God into the process and ask Him what He has for you in the coming year.
  2. Stick to three or four resolutions; don’t overload yourself with a ton of things.
  3. Quantify your goals. Instead of saying, “Read more,” set a more quantifiable goal, like, “Read one book every three months.”

By Destiny Gonzalez – Communications Staff

Three Things I Learned From Anxiety

“You really aren’t good enough. You missed the mark again, are you actually surprised? You have to get better; you’re only going to hold people back. You can’t even get yourself together, why do you think you can lead people?”

These irrational and paralyzing thoughts swirled around in my head until the familiar feeling of my chest tightening came and I fought to keep my breathing at a normal pace. My heart raced and tears burned the corners of my eyes. My car became my only safe haven, and I drove around squinting to see between the streaming tears that clouded my vision. The thoughts mocked me, and I pleaded for them to stop. When I came to a place of feeling completely defeated, my panic attack would end. I breathed a sigh of relief, but instead of being at ease, I was left feeling defeated and humiliated.

This past spring was one of the hardest seasons of my life because this was my reality. Anxiety lingered over my head for years, but during this season it completely took over.


Processes are hard and at times they feel hopeless. Even after I felt freedom from anxiety, the enemy wanted to replace my anxious thoughts with shameful ones. But this is why I’m so thankful for the process! I am left with a foundation of truth to stand on when the enemy wants to paralyze me with shame.


  • 1. God isn’t afraid of your emotions // In some of my deepest places of pain, I found God to be my greatest comforter. Out of confusion and pain, I found myself yelling and asking God why this was happening to me. He didn’t take my anxiety away right away, and I expected Him to eventually get irritated by my wild emotions. I waited for Him to go silent, but God shattered my expectations. He continually spoke words of comfort and peace. I realized we are known and loved by a God who isn’t only able, but willing.
  • 2. Isolation keeps you trapped // Time and time again, I convinced myself isolation was safe. Letting people in is risky, and I believed it would only cause me more pain. What I’ve learned is the ways of the Kingdom don’t always make sense because it’s actually the complete opposite. We need community. The Bible states it so clearly in Hebrews 10: 24-25. God places people in our lives to lift our arms up when we can’t. I spent so much energy hiding my anxiety from my roommates. Out of fear I wanted to keep them out, but they ended up being a sole source of encouragement and truth when I needed it most.
  • 3. Healing doesn’t always happen overnight // I had my first panic attack when I was 15-years-old. Anxiety was prevalent in my life for eight years before I really felt like I had a breakthrough. Sometimes we pray and we see God miraculously heal and restore in an instant, and it’s amazing. Other times, it is a process. In times like this, the enemy wants to creep in and make us believe God will never bring a breakthrough. The Lord hears the cries of His people (Psalm 34:17-19), and I’m confident that He loves to answer our prayers. But my unanswered prayers were an invitation to deeper intimacy with Him. In those moments of desperation, I learned more about God’s character and more about who He has called me to be as a daughter. I am more confident now in His faithfulness because He was faithful to meet me every step of the way.


I am thankful for the process because it brought me into a place of freedom and deeper intimacy with God. Whether it’s anxiety or something else, I believe God has breakthrough for you.

  • Don’t be afraid to be real with God. Let Him into your places of pain, He isn’t intimidated by it.
  • Let people into your process. It isn’t always easy to be vulnerable, but it’s always worth it.
  • Don’t stop believing for breakthrough. God hears the cries of His children and He’s faithful to answer.

By Destiny Gonzalez – Communications Staff

How to Pray for Our City

“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden.” – Matthew 5:14

I’m convinced Waco is a city set on a hill. The Lord has spoken words of life over Waco time and time again, and we have the opportunity to partner with Him to see the glory of God magnified in this place.

In the early 1900s Waco was known as a place of hope and healing. People would travel from all over to visit the artesian springs that supposedly had healing powers. The springs are long gone, but healing, restoration and hope is still something that marks our city.


Waco doesn’t only hold an expectation for physical healing it has also poised itself to be a place for people to find restoration and life in Jesus. Years ago revival was evident at Baylor University. At a conference, students were stirred by the presence of God and found themselves with a desire to be completely sold out to God. This desire is still alive in people all over our city. Last week we hosted Nights of Revival, and the Auditorium was packed night after night as people encountered the presence of God and hungered for more.

Driving around Waco, it is evident our city is filled with different cultures. Our city is painted with diversity, and it’s not only beautiful, but needed. As we’re unified throughout our city, God is glorified. Two years ago churches across the city came together to host The Gathering, a city-wide worship celebration. The culture of Heaven was on display at McLane Stadium as people were unified to worship Jesus.

Waco is a place marked by God, and through prayer, we have the opportunity to believe for His Kingdom to come in our city.


  • Hope and Healing // Whether someone is in need of physical or emotional healing, pray for God to miraculously heal those needing a touch from Him. Pray for hope to be ignited throughout Waco, and for the hopeless to find fresh life.
  • Revival // Pray for a move of God to spread across Waco, and for people to deeply encounter the presence of God. Pray for those in our city that don’t know Jesus to meet Him in a real way.
  • Unity // Pray for the culture of Heaven to be a reality in Waco as we learn to celebrate the diversity of our city. Pray for the churches in our city to lead out in being unified.
  • The Gathering // This Sunday, April 9th, our city will come together to host The Gathering at McLane Stadium once again. Pray for the leaders and speakers to be covered, and for people to fill the stadium and find hope and life in Jesus.

Join us at The Gathering, this Sunday, from 6:30 p.m. – 8:30 p.m. at McLane Stadium. It will be a powerful time as we worship and hear from Pastor Miles McPherson, Baylor basketball coach Scott Drew and musical artist Anthony Evans. Doors open at 4:15 p.m. and the event is free, but we encourage you to bring canned goods to donate to Caritas and Shepherd’s Heart food pantries. Learn more, including information on where to park at

By Destiny Gonzalez – Communications Coordinator

Making the Most of Your Summer: In Waco

Waco is a wonderland. At least that’s what people always say, right? You may be wondering, “What exactly is there to do in Waco?”

After spending my summer here for the last few years I can assure you, Waco really is a wonderland, and there is no better time than summertime in this great city.

Check out some of my suggestions on what to do in Waco during the summer:
  • Get outside this summer! With one of the largest parks in the country, the Brazos River and Lake Waco, there are many opportunities for some fun in the sun:
    • Cameron Park: Waco is home to one of the largest municipal parks, located right along the Brazos River. Grab some friends and have a picnic by the river, go on a hike or play a round of frisbee golf. The options are almost endless.
    • Brazos River: Speaking of the river, be sure to take an opportunity to get out on the water. Head over to Bicycle World, located in downtown Waco, to rent a kayak, paddle board or canoe.
    • Cameron Park Zoo: If you can’t make it on a safari this summer, Waco has the next best thing! Head out to Cameron Park Zoo for an afternoon with some wildlife.
    • Waco Downtown Farmer’s Market: Saturday mornings were made for the farmer’s market! Reject the snooze on Saturday morning and grab some breakfast or do a little grocery shopping all in one place. During the summer, the market is also open on Tuesdays from 3 p.m. to 7 p.m.
  • With the Texas heat, you’ll definitely want to get a cold, sweet treat and these places are worth visiting:
    • Mr. Snow Shaved Ice Stand: This is your classic snow cone stand with flavors like Ninja Turtle and Wedding Cake as some of the favorites. What makes this place stand out among the rest is their combination of snow cones and ice cream rolled into one treat called a Love Nest.
    • Heritage Creamery: Located right next to Common Grounds coffee shop, this creamery is a perfect combination of hipster vibes and waffle cones. Their unique flavors include honey lavender and oatmeal brown sugar. I like a more classic salty vanilla bean, but don’t be afraid to venture out with a more daring flavor.
    • Common Grounds: If you’re not feeling ice cream, stop by Common Grounds and try a Cowboy Coffee. If you’re not much of a coffee drinker, try the Moroccan mint tea. Either option makes for a refreshing, afternoon pick-me-up.
    • Pokey O’s: This dessert truck specializes in sweet Blue Bell Ice Cream squished between two homemade cookies. What could be better than that? Because this is a food truck, you’ll have to check their Instagram to find out their location and hours.
  • If you’re not really feeling the outdoors or something sweet, check out some of these other fun places in Waco:
    • Waco Hippodrome: This recently renovated theatre is the perfect place to catch a movie. With a twist on your traditional movie snack bar, the Hippodrome offers full-service dining during the movie.
    • Downtown Food Trucks: Venture out of traditional restaurants and head to the food trucks downtown. The food trucks offer a hip, Austin vibe with shorter lines and less traffic. From Greek, to Indian to traditional Texas barbecue, there is something for everyone to enjoy.
    • Magnolia Market: Have you heard of Fixer Upper? There’s no way you can live in Waco and not know about the hit HGTV show! Check out Chip and Joanna Gaines’ Magnolia Market Silos to find some inspiration for your home or hang out with friends in the backyard.
      • Local Tip: If you go on Wednesdays, you can enjoy a grilled cheese from Cheddar Box food truck for only $5, just tell them you’re there for Wacotown Wednesday.
    • Visit a Museum: Take in a little culture with the Art Center of Waco, the Texas Sports Hall of Fame, the Mayborn Museum or the Dr Pepper Museum.

There are endless possibilities to have some fun in Waco, and I hope by the end of the summer, you’ll be convinced that Waco really is a wonderland.

By Destiny Gonzalez- Antioch Communications Coordinator

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